Marianne Pohl
Aug 2026
After my mother's passing at St. Mary's Asbury Ridge 10 months ago I had no intention of posting a review, but the recent review (a week ago) of a daughter's experience with her mother's care at St. Mary's has rekindled my heartache and now compels me to do so.<br><br>My 96 year old mother was a resident (July-Oct, 2025) in the skilled unit. Absolutely there were a "small group" of wonderful hard-working nurses and CNAs that provided kind, compassionate, dignified, and professional care to my mother along with the fantastic ancillary/support staff, but sadly based on my experiences and my opinion, many of the direct care staff were inattentive, uninterested, and unaccountable.<br><br>My mother was visually/physically impaired but alert/oriented. Often times her call bell was not within her reach, forcing her to call me via her speed-dial telephone to ask me to contact the nurse's station for assistance (I live 2.5 hours away). This was verified by my mother, by a family visitor, and by honest feedback from a few staff members who occasionally witnessed these episodes and would step in to help. At times my mother would be told, "I'll be back" but would wait over 30 minutes for someone to return to assist her, if they returned at all. I observed this in person and also while I was on the telephone with her.<br><br>My mother received Hospice care nearly two weeks before she passed away. There were instances where my mother's comfort medications weren't given to her consistently because the medication order had been written "as needed", relying on the judgment of the nurse who was caring for my mother during each shift. Several times this resulted in my mother becoming restless and struggling with her breathing. Once in particular I even had to contact the emergency after-hours Hospice nurse who advocated for my mother to receive her comfort medications from an evening shift nurse.<br><br>A very compassionate LPN who had been trying to educate other staff on the need for my mother to receive her comfort medications on a consistent basis encouraged Hospice to order the comfort medications as "scheduled" to ensure my mother's comfort. Three days before her passing my mother was finally comfortable, calm, peaceful, and free of struggle.<br><br>There were also ongoing issues with my mother not having her incontinence brief changed when needed, particularly during the last several weeks of her life when she was too weak to advocate for herself. During those weeks when I visited, I would at times find her in a wet and/or soiled brief, even up to the last 24 hours of her life while she was still putting out urine.<br><br>I do understand that most facilities have staff shortages and most likely these care issues would have happened at other skilled facilities. However, I had expected better from St. Mary's and this haunts me to this day.<br><br>I will end by saying that no matter which skilled facility your loved one may be in, it is VERY important that someone who knows the loved one be physically present on a daily basis (if possible) to make sure they are receiving the care they need.
